Due to this time change throwing my sleep off and BET rearranging the Tuesday night schedule, I fell asleep before I could watch Mary Jane last Tuesday night. I’m sorry that I wasn’t able to provide my awesome commentary live via Twitter but I will tomorrow. (Lol) Anyway, y’all know I learn from TV right? It’s something about seeing your favorite characters on TV acting a plum fool that makes the voice inside of your head say, “I ain’t doing this no more!” Well, I felt this while watching Being Mary Jane.
We’ve come to know Mary Jane as the quintessential new age black woman: great career, owns her own home and car, has a bae or two (but no solid relationship), and no kids. I’ve connected with her on SO many levels (not the sleeping with a married man part or the frequent casual sex part…but I’m not judging. Lol for real, I’m not ) but this episode I connected with Kara.
Kara represents a lot of women, working mothers, single mothers, not mothers at all, trying hard to balance EVERYTHING on her own. When she broke down over those brownies I broke down with her. I’ve spent my young life trying to me a master of everything and appease everyone and my own inner self. I joined organizations, took on leadership roles, worked multiple jobs, dated people, purchased things, all because I thought I needed to do ALL of this stuff. I didn’t want to let anyone down, especially myself. Sometimes as women, we are SO hard on ourselves, we try to be everything to everyone because we think we have to. We want everything to be perfect. We think people will talk bad about us if we don’t. I felt Kara’s pain. She wanted to make those brownies to show the other mothers than she too was a good mom.
You can’t do it all. You just can’t. I’m the most driven feminist out there and I’m here to say that you can not do it all…alone. That’s the point of a support system. Whether it’s a husband, partner, girlfriend, sister, whoever, it is important that you know that there is people there to help you get it all done because you can’t do it all alone.
Do you struggle with trying to do it all? What other tips do you use to cope?